How He Sees Me (posted by Mic)
I would like to share a conversation that I had with God the other day. This conversation was one of those random times where God chooses, for His own reasons, to reveal something grand to me when I’m not even looking for it. I was driving home from work around 11pm – I have about a 30 minute drive home – and was just thinking about all of the ways that I feel that I am failing God. Nothing really brought it on. It was a very typical day at work, I hadn’t argued with my wife or comitted some horrible sin. I was just thinking about how I so often fail to make time for Him, about my propensity to choose my own way over His, and how I believe that He has such wonderful things to give someone who is wholeheartedly devoted to him. I know that we all mess up. I was just feeling it acutely. And as I was thinking about these things, my heart cried “Lord, please heal me!” My heart was desiring an intimacy with its Creator that was being prevented by sin. And as clearly as if He had been sitting in the passenger seat of the car with me, He spoke to my heart with a beauty and love that completely overwhelmed me. “Child, you are healed! You just haven’t accepted it yet!”
I must confess, at first I scoffed at the thought! I spoke out loud, “but I’m not healed!” I thought about all of the times that I’ve failed Him, that I’ve made the wrong choice, that I’ve chosen me above Him. How could He say that I’ve been healed when I’m still so prone to sin? But as the weight of his words began to sink into my heart, I realized something. He was not saying that I was immune to sin. I most certainly wasn’t. But I realized that I was living as if I was still bound by the power of sin. I saw myself as a failure, tainted, lost. But, through Jesus, I’m not any of those things! I was choosing to believe a lie of condemnation which led to more sin. What God was saying to me was that all of those things no longer stick to me. How He washed me is not like taking a shower, in which the dirt washes off, and as soon as you step from the shower more begins to accumulate. No – rather, to put it crudely, God washes you and applies a holy teflon coat (really, I’m sorry for this analogy and I know that Teflon is a trademark) which prevents the dirt from ever sticking again. Therefore, even though we all should be layered in grime, we are not! When God sees me, he sees me through the perfection of His Son, Jesus – bright, pure, holy in His sight! He does not condemn me, although he would be quite within His right to! So if He does not call me a failure, then why do I choose to believe that I am? If he does not call me broken, why do I act as if I still am? I AM healed! I just hadn’t accepted it yet! It had not worked its way into the framework of my decision-making. I was believing a lie!
So, I have now chosen to believe Him when He says that I am healed. How silly for the healed to sit and beg to be healed again! Get up! Take up your mat and walk! Live in the light of who He says you are, let that reality sink in deep and change the way you live. Stop trying to be better – accept that by His sacrifice, you are now Holy, and live it!
Child, you are healed! Have you accepted it yet?
Christina Price said,
July 17, 2010 at 8:11 pm
Thank you for sharing this great reminder!